When you first get into cuckolding (or cucking), one of the first things that strikes you is the language that the community uses. Aside from the many terms for the men involved, women also have a number of labels, including “hot wives” and “cuckoldresses.” People outside the scene often use the two terms interchangeably, but is this really the case? Actually, no. The two terms have major differences, and they are really two very different roles for women to choose. Here’s how to decide whether you are a hot wife or a cuckoldress.
The first thing to note about the two roles is that being a cuckoldress can only happen in a cuckolding scenario. However, a hot wife can assume her role in any number of situations. The “hot” part of the term essentially means “slutty” or “available”, as well as sexually active, confident and able to act autonomously from your partner. So hot wives could be part of swinging communities, wife sharing groups or just engaged in everyday adultery. If you are the kind of girl who loves sex and isn’t satisfied by your partner, you’re in hot wife territory.
So, if hot wives are wives that make themselves sexually available to other men (and women), where does this leave the cuckoldress community? A cuckoldress is a special kind of hot wife, the kind who gets off on humiliating their partner in situations with agreed limits. In a sense, she can only become a cuckoldress if she has a cuckold to complete the “act.” If you are fucking other guys and your husband doesn’t know, or finds it enraging, you aren’t a cuckoldress. A cuckoldress has license to humiliate her partner during sex with other men. Her partner loves it, and so does she.
Some people divide cuckoldresses and hot wives by their attitude towards sex. Hot wives are motivated more by a desire for quantity. They become “addicted to cock” and desire as many sexual partners as possible. They play up to the slut role in an exaggerated, obsessive way. But for the cuckoldress, the quest isn’t for more sex. She wants a better quality of sex, the kind of sensations that her husband simply cannot deliver. For many people, the cuckoldress role is healthier. If the guy is comfortable as the cuckold, it can be a way to deal with sexual problems within relationships. That’s not really the case for out of control hot wives.
Another way of looking at the difference between hot wives and cuckoldresses is bedroom politics. The classical “hot wife” isn’t fucking to make herself more empowered. She is doing so because she needs to. It’s in her blood. For the cuckoldress, things are completely different. In many cases, cuckoldresses feel empowered by their role. They can exert power over both their husband and their bull, dominating both with their sexual authority. They tend to be the instigator in cuckolding sessions, making decisions about who should be the bull and what limits will be imposed. It’s all part of reducing their partner to nothingness, and for some women, it can be exhilarating.
When we get down to it, there’s a major difference in how the terms “hot wife” and “cuckoldress” are generated, and that’s where they come from. Who really sustains the image of a “hot wife” fucking an endless parade of men? Is it women themselves or the men in their life? Probably the latter. While the “hot wife” is usually a fantasy created by guys, a “cuckoldress” is much more complex. It can be a subversive female role, one which targets the same male desires that create the “hot wife” persona and reduces them to humiliation.
At a more practical level, playing the cuckoldress is simply more demanding and fulfilling. It requires the ability to use words to goad your bull and humiliate your partner. It requires the physical confidence to dominate your partner, without losing the erotic charge between you and the bull. It also requires getting the atmosphere right. You need to have an instinct for lighting, costume, how to entertain strangers – an attention to detail that is irrelevant for hot wives. Hot wives just need a mattress and a guy. To be a successful cuckoldress requires imagination, so if you feel you have what it takes, give it a try. It’s not for every woman, but it could be the role for you.
Image sources Image Fotolia.com - Knut Wiarda